Monday, August 29, 2011

Summer Hiatus...

So I took a little month-long break for the summer from blogging.  Not so much because I wanted to.  I actually have been driving myself crazy staring at Blogger thinking "I want to write.  I want to write about EVERYTHING."  But some things are not my stories to tell.  But those things shouldn't hold me back.  And so I'm going to catch you up on the last month because it has been a DOOSY of a summer, let me tell you!

OK, so the break started when I went to Florida.  I think I went on vacation and just never really felt like coming back...

So getting out of NYC took 4 hours longer than expected.  It was... drizzling.  Sporadically.  And thus, no flights.  Because New York SUCKS like that.  So rather than getting in at 10pm or so, I arrived at 2:30am.  Yes that's right.  Awful.  But then I was there YAY!!  We decided to stay at the pool where we were staying the first day (Saturday) since the travel day before had been so rough.  I will omit the story about my mom getting upset that we weren't doing anything by 10am after she had decided to tell us that we were making no plans for the following day so we could all sleep in and relax.  O wait.  That's kind of the story...  Whoops!

Sunday we went to Typhoon Lagoon. 

Holy.  Hot.  People, there aren't even words.  By the end of the day I was literally sitting down in the wave pool just trying to keep cool.  SITTING IN WATER WAS NOT HELPING!We did the slides early in the day which were all a lot of fun.  But by the time the afternoon rolled around I couldn't stand the idea of being out of the water and in the sun for that long.  Just no way.  Also?  The water was either heated... or it was just SO hot that the water couldn't even keep itself cool.  Which is really saying something. 

So I kept the first 2 days straight.  Now I have to refer to Facebook posts to figure out where the crap I went...

Looks like the next day was  a pool day and then we went to City Walk at Universal.  This place is pretty cool, and would probably be a lot of fun with a group of my girls! Tons of cool night life (although it was a little dead mid-week).  Being from Hershey and living in NYC, I have a real issue with playing the part of Tourist.  Mostly because I know how much they annoy me.  My family does not suffer this same affliction.  I will leave it at that :)  But we had fun, we got to see the last Harry Potter movie which was downright incredible!  We caught a glimpse at the Harry Potter theme park at Universal which looks so freaking cool!  I had a couple of drinks on this particular night because... well ... they were necessary.  But that put me right to sleep! 

The next day we went here:

And stayed until this time:

and this time:

And in case you need another visual:

And that's just a drop in the bucket!  Buzz took about 4 million!  We were comparing cell phone photo capabilities.  My blackberry failed miserably.

We did the best rides... Splash Mountain and the Haunted House.  Splash Mountain will always be my favorite.  The line is HELLA long but it's also a super long ride, with the added bonus of being all about Brer Rabbit, Brer Bear and Brer Fox.  My mom used to read me those stories when I was little and she tried to do this terrible southern accent that I'll never forget!  Ah... memories...  We also did Space Mountain which had me in a laughing fit because of my mom's screams!  I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard at her and she thought I was just having so much fun I couldn't stop laughing!  Which probably would have been true if I could concentrate on anything other than her high pitched wailing... awesome!  Buzz Lightyear was a favorite... it was basically like being inside a video game where everyone had their own laser pointer attached to their car (you thought I was gonna say head in a Dr. Evil voice didn't you?) and you aimed it at targets which earned points.  We all felt we had a faulty laser pointer at one point or another due to low scores.  Maybe we just sucked. 

That night we saw the fireworks display from just outside the park which was really pretty.  I can't believe they do that every night!  Geez!  Also?  I'd like to know what kind of crack those employees are on.


Listen.  I have worked at both theme parks and restaurants.  There is something that makes them smiley, happy, and approaching annoying and needy guests to offer assistance.  Because when it comes to myself in the same situations?  I kind of wanted to just kill myself on the spot.  So what is it?!  You can't tell me they make much above minimum wage, they couldn't afford all those people!  The food there isn't that great, so even free food wouldn't buy that kind of attitude.  I'm telling you it has to be crack!  Or sugar...

OK.  So then the next day we went to Melbourne Beach.

Look at that!

This place was beautiful!  There weren't many people there.  The water was perfectly refreshing.  We spent a couple hours there.  We had sandywiches (see what I did there?) on our towels and just enjoyed the salty air.  The pelicans were out and diving for fish which was pretty incredible to see.  Mom was a little nervous about sharks.  Jeannine got excited about warm spots until we told her somebody probably peed there.  The weather in Florida is a little weird.  It was supposed to rain every single day, and it did... just not all over the place.  Little pockets got heavy downpours while other places stayed looking like the picture above.  So that was nice!

The last day in Florida was spent at Blizzard Beach.

So at least this place had cool water!  It should, what with it being BLIZZARD beach.  See that tall structure in the middle?  Those are slides.  I went down the second highest.  Pretty fun minus the wedgie.  But these slides didn't compare at all to Typhoon Lagoon.  But they did have a pretty great lazy river, and the group raft ride was awesome!  To get to the top they had a "ski lift" which was handy.  Because we took the stairs once and all my confidence in my cardio went right out the window.

After that a series of events occurred.  Allow me to summarize some...

Jersey Shore is back in my life... and has brought me Twinning, Mike the Situation knocking his own damn self out, and Ronnie and Sammy beating a dead horse directly into the ground.  Ahh... I love this stuff.

Ana and I tried to go to see Friends With Benefits at the theater, and the theater busted all up.  So no movie.  Instead I introduced her to Blockheads, and namely their frozen margaritas.  I got the girl all wasty-face, and then sent her home to pack for Chicago!  Entertaining for me, but for her?  Let's just say that I got a text the next day saying "OMG Connie, I have no idea what I packed or if it's even appropriate for work!"  Awesome.

Football started!!! YAAAAYYY!!!  So far the Eagles have 2 wins and a loss (to the Steelers... crap.) in the pre-season.  Next game is on Thursday against the Jets.  I might have to plan on going to an Eagles bar... I'll keep you posted on that.  No seriously.  Why do you doubt me!  Why do you have to bring up my absence over the last month!  Geez!  Always bringing up crap from the past!  How can we move on if you harbor such resentment?!

I did decide that I want this Jersey.

Bad.  The issue is this.  So far I have a Trotter and a Westbrook jersey.  Guess who are no longer on the team?  But if I get a Cunningham throwback jersey, he's no longer on the team!  He can't be traded!  Also?  Cunningham and I go way back.  When I was in 3rd grade my dad took me down to West Chester University (my future Alma matre) where the Eagles were practicing.  I was the last autograph Cunningham gave that day.  Ahh... I'm such a lucky girl.  What's that?  Where is that autograph?  My GOD I wish I knew.  Grrrr...  Anyway.  If any of you see this, PLEASE tell me!  NFL shop has sold out and clearly?  I need this.

I have a few more arts and craft projects on the horizon.  I am thinking of selling my big book shelves and getting a small book shelf.  Also planning on covering or painting the wood planks that Alice so kindly removed from my fireplace and making them into shelves.  And I am starting on Christmas presents.  I WILL ALSO KEEP YOU UPDATED ON THESE.

I bar hopped the crap out of a Saturday.  No, you heard me right.  SaturDAY.  All day.  From lunchtime on... and on... and on...

My brother and his girlfriend came to NYC!!  Yaaaaay! The first of the Funks to make that trip!  I'm so proud :)  They spent the day running around the city with her mom and sister, but I got to meet up with them for a few minutes.  They were beat!  But I think Scott feels comfortable enough to convince everybody else to head up.  WOULDN'T THAT BE LOVELY?!

I asked people to help me hook up my Wii via Facebook.  2 people "liked" my status.  Nobody hooked up my Wii.  What the crap is that about?

I had an EPIC movie day with Ana, which Blake (Josh's friend from out of town) join in on, and then later Miranda and Natalie joined in too.  We watched Precious ("Heeeey... my favorite color is fluorescent beige..."), Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, The Town... oh GEEZ!  I forget.  We definitely watched at least 5.  We also had taco dip, and s'mores we made over Ana's gas stove.  Mmmm... I could use one or ten of those right now... She was going to send some up last night with Josh (her resident delivery boy), but he went out for beer instead.  Terrible delivery boy.

Last week Terri and I got on a for real work out kick!  It was fantastic!  We either walked home or went to the gym Sunday through Thursday last week.  I really felt great.  Of course I destroyed it all this weekend, but we'll get to that.

Terri and Ollie-Wollie on one of our walks

So last week we had a little excitement.  Here I am, sitting at my desk around 1:30pm (EST) and I started to feel a little light headed.  I thought maybe I was just hungry so I ignored it, but then I realized it felt like my chair was bouncing up and down.  That's not a hunger pang I am familiar with actually... So then I look up a little bit and notice that my water in my water bottle is sloshing around.  Either my stomach is really growling or there's something else going on here...  So I look up, and Eric (my co-worker) says "did you feel the earthquake?" 



No no no this is NYC.  We're more likely to have King Kong here than an earthquake.  Are you SURE there isn't a giant gorilla clinging to the side of our building? 

Nope.  Totally an earthquake.  Awesome.

So naturally I rushed home (after work and after the gym because helloooo... Terri and I made a pact!) to make sure my little Puka was OK.

Puka was all "What?  No big deal.  I'm kind of a bad ass.  So the ground shook? And?  Look at me!  Totally good...."

Then, as though that wasn't enough Mother Nature for one week, we start hearing about Hurricane Irene hitting us dead on a few days later.  So the city just loses its' EVER LOVING MIND and starts going APE SHIT over this storm which... really?  So the city does what it usually does and incites public panic.  "We're evacuating you AND shutting down all public transportation HOURS earlier than necessary just to mess with you so YOU figure it out!  Muaahahahahahaha...  Oh, and also?  We're shutting down all roads that lead into or out of NYC and surrounding areas.  So yeah, you can't do that either.  We are also going to set up evacuation centers for those that need it.  Best of luck figuring out where they are, as many are quite close to evacuation zones.  But all of this is OK because even though we really think it's for the best if you evacuate, we're only making it a volunteer basis which means that we don't have to be held responsible for you having a way out of the evacuation zone! WEEEEE!!!!"

You know who wasn't phased?

Bad.   Ass.
I tried to get up on Saturday and do laundry, which was closed.  And then I tried to grab a few extra groceries form the store... which was closed.  I would have visited friends, but by the time I finished getting anything done at all (AKA picking up my room) the MTA had already shut down all buses and subways.  So I sat in my house, on the couch, and watched TV.  I watched a little of the 24/7 Hurricane Irene Watch.  Ugh.  Boring.  I think about 3am on Sunday is when anything of note happened.  As Puka and I put ourselves to bed, the wind started up, and the rain got heavier.  Something crashed outside (I have no idea what it was to this day so I'm assuming it was nothing and no big deal.  Yup.) and Puka (the Bad Ass?)  nearly jumped out of her skin.  She stayed close for the rest of the night.  The next morning I expected to see chunks missing out of buildings and my windows shattered and branches and whole trees laying in the streets.


There were some leaves?  And the rain we got didn't even wash away the dirt from the construction happening across the street. 

I turned on the TV to check out what the news was saying.  Nothing in NYC was even worth showing.  I saw images from North Carolina, Virgina, Maryland, Delaware, Long Island and Rhode Island. 

Here's the thing.  I'm glad we were prepared just in case.  But the panic that the media and city officials caused was absolutely ridiculous.  Shutting down ALL public transportation that early in the day is crazy.  It was closed 16 hours before the storm even it, and 24 hours before the storm was expected to hit.  Shutting down the city like that makes things worse, not better.  By the time people have current information, it's too late to evacuate.  Crazy town.  But whatever, we survived.  I found out my office was open today before I knew whether subways would be up and running again.  So I thought I was going to have to walk to work... ugh!  Thankfully everything was back to normal for the most part.  I left a little early since I assumed they would be running slower than normal.  But the tracks were dry as the Sahara and everything was just peachy.  I got to work about 15 minutes early (20 minutes before I normally do... ha ha... but seriously.) and it is nothing but a beautiful day here!  Sunny, 70 degrees, breezy... fantastic.

Last night were the VMAs.  I'm going to give you a run down of my comments that I posted to Facebook, as they apparently summed them up well according to my friend Jill.  So here we go...

The VMAs are looking a little raw... and not so much in a good way...

I love Katy Perry coming in with Russell Brand... ugh... adorable!

What the crap is happening right now?  GaGa... you've lost me.  She's so far gone, Britney Spears doesn't even get it.  I think she created that alter ego because she out-weirded what even GaGa could handle and had to become a second person.

Oh Hov, I do love you, why are you letting that skeez share the stage with you?

Adele makes me want to do something between smile and cry...

Can somebody tell the Beib that his glasses are too big?

Chris Brown's performances are so fun!

The Britney Spears Tribute was the best performance of the night... AMAZING!

OK Beyonce... way to class it up... finally!


Tyler the Creator's mama is losin her MIND!  But can he please stop cursing in front of his mom?  Have a little respect.

Russel Brand has quickly become one of my favorite people...

Ugh... Katy and Russel... you kids break my little heart...

Drake, it's summer... what the crap are you wearing that cheesy cardigan for?

if Lil Wayne wasn't so freakin ugly he'd be hot... know what I mean?

*Edited to add: Viacom SUCKS for taking away all of my videos I had posted!  I will never understand why people don't want these things shared!  So stupid!*

And last, and definitely the least important... the DJ has been a big ole pain in the ass this last month.  His birthday was on the 14th.  He had personally sent me an OPEN TO THE PUBLIC FACEBOOK INVITE TO HIS BIRTHDAY, and then got all upset that I wasn't coming down for the occasion because "CLEARLY" he wanted me there.  So he got angry, and then he started tagging me in facebook posts, sending me IMs for no reason... yada yada yada.  Finally his birthday weekend came and I still did not go down to DC for the festivities.  Obvi.  I posted a question to the general population of facebook on Saturday morning which he responded to, and then immediately called me to walk me through it.  I did send him a birthday card just to be nice.  He was clearly upset (for whatever reason) that I wasn't at his birthday, so I figured the least I could do would be to send him a card.  So he called me for a second time that same day to thank me for the card.  And then I was badgered all day Sunday via BBM about how I should go to visit, and how much he looooved me, and how he needed to see a little effort on my part.  Clearly I find this to be a stupid, stupid idea.  But after talking to Flo, she made a good point.  So what if I go down?  One of two things are going to happen.  I might get set back, and start to miss him and want him back.  Or, I'm going to go down and see what I already know is happening and realize that I want no part of it.  This way I would get closure and not even have a reason to keep talking to him and I could move on. 


It didn't even need to go that far.  I did agree to visit him.  The very next day he told me he was so drunk he didn't remember asking me to visit, but that I still 'could' .  COULD?!  That makes it sound like I was requesting to see him!  Not at all the case!  And then he tags me in the album from his birthday on facebook.  I'm tagged to the face of the UGLIEST girl that he's taken up hanging out with, and my facebook wall is plastered with him hanging all over his ex-girlfriend with his tongue down her throat.  Yeah... I'm good.  I really didn't need closure to begin with, but I don't need to be disrespected continuously by a guy I have nothing to do with.  I told him I would not be coming and that he needed to un-tag me from the album.   Then I set to deleting him.  I deleted him from BBM, phone contacts, email contacts, AIM, and both facebook pages. 

Then he emailed me.  And I told him to feel free to lose my number and my email address.  The response I got was "Really?!  OK... good luck then..." and that's been it.  I think my cutting him off for the first time since I kicked him out of bed almost 8 months ago was enough of a blow to his ego for him to contact me again.  We'll see.  But it is nice not having him around at all, even in the social networking world.

On a positive boy note... Mike is just doing fabulous things again and is a producer for Fox's new show called "Dish Nation"!  So cool right??  I'm really excited for him and impressed as usual.  Why is this country so freaking big?!  Anyway, check your local listings or go to so proud!

OK, so there it is.  It's in no way concise or really all that pretty.  But it's my life over the last month.  And now that I feel a bit more on track and refreshed after a lack of expressing myself, I think I'll probably keep it up :)

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