Monday, February 14, 2011

For the Holy Love of God...

Last week was... just... there are no words.  1st, I suck at posting.  I suck at posting pictures about past weekends, or telling wild stories.  I suck at ranting about things that are bothering me in the moment because I want my posts to come across as well thought out and written and blah blah blah.  Funny story.  NONE OF THAT HAPPENS IF YOU POST NOTHING AT ALL.  Ridiculous.

So here we go.  A catch-up to my so-called life of total insanity.

PART 1:  2 Weekends Ago

So I traveled to Phoenixville, Pennsylvania 2 weekends ago.  I was visiting my college friends who I miss dearly!  I was staying with Alyssa and her current squatter/ best roomie ever Kate.  OF COURSE Megabus was running behind schedule, causing me to miss the 9:19 train by about 7 minutes and then having to wait or the 10:19 train.  And OF COURSE that train was running behind schedule because instead of arriving at my train stop at 11pm, it was more like 11:15pm.  But none of this matters.  Because Alyssa?  Was having a scandalous rendezvous with her co-worker that made for a very fun car ride home! 

Alyssa showed up about 10 minutes after I arrived.  In that time a really nice couple, who was waiting for their college-age daughter and her boyfriend to arrive on the next train, asked me if I needed a ride/phone call/ chaperon... soooo sweet!  People don't do that shit in NYC.  Oh you're alone and cold looking late at night?  You'll be aiight...

So that night Alyssa and I have a girls night complete with chatting and cheeze balls.  It was really lovely just catching up.  The next day we ran a few errands, I bought a pillow for my up-coming home make over at Homegoods, a store I could literally spend weeks in and never get sick of! 


And that night we met up with MY old and bestest roomie Katie and company.  I say Katie and company because she came trailing about 15+ people to the bar.  Kate (not to be mistaken with Katie... 2 very different people.) and Alyssa and I had dinner.  I had soup and a salad, paired with a Blue Moon.  It was fabulous.  From there we did a Dr. Pepper shot together (Half of a light beer with a shot of amaretto dropped into it and chugged.  Tastes just like Dr. Pepper).  Then I opted to go for a double grape vodka and sprite.  It tasted like Koolaid.  I feel like you know where this is going already...

2 more double grape vodka and sprites, and Alyssa, Kate and I decide it's time to hit the road.  Why?  Not really sure.  Katie had already broken her camera trying to take a super hot picture of our kind of similar black boots.  We are the crazy.  We all planned to meet at Club 212 later, which is apparently Phoenixville's premiere dance club venue.  I was excited!


Taken at a crazy angle because I?  Was not sober.


First, Kate, Alyssa and I ventured over to... another bar whose name I cannot remember.  We went upstairs and got YET ANOTHER DOUBLE VODKA AND SODA from the bartender that looked like a squishy Jake Gyllenhaal.  He was fantastic.  His shirt said "To our wives, our girlfriends... may they never meet" which I found hilarious for some reason.  Because that?  Is not all that cool if you really think about it.  And not even REALLY think about it, more like if you just read the damn shirt it's clear that is not OK.  But funny ha ha because I was 1 shot, 1.5 beers and about 3 MILLION VODKA DRINKS deep at that point.

And onward we went.  To club 212.  After I talked to friend Mike on the phone while I peed, which is SOO not something I do.  Ew.  Bathroom time is alone time.  Anyway.  Club 212.  I buy our round of single drinks because, ya know, we don't wanna get TOO crazy with all the doubles and whatnot.  The round costs the same as 1 martini in midtown.  I am elated.  We go upstairs where I dance like nobody's watching.  Seriously.  And all the girls didn't like me and I'm not sure why.  Because I?  Was so uninterested in any male figure in that whole place.  But alas, the girls did not like me.  I got dirty looks.  Maybe I was obviously drunk and they were disgusted by me?  Doubtful.  Because the drunk Connie is the fun Connie!  Or at least one version of the fun Connie.  Katie and company couldn't get into Club 212 because they have a hardcore dress code, yo.  Apparently, no Timberland boots allowed.  Seriously?  SERIOUSLY?  We're in phoenixville in the WINTER!  Boots are necessary, get over yourselves.

Anyway, we stumbled home, and ate some cheeze balls and Kate says that Alyssa and I fell asleep pretty much as soon as we touched the couch.  The next day I came back to New York City.  To an empty apartment because the DJ was gone until Monday night when he would return to pack-up and move-out all of his things.....

PART 2: The DJ

This has been pretty awful, kids.  The breakup with the DJ, in my opinion, was always stupid.  But as you can probably tell, has gotten spiteful and hurtful over the last month.  Things have been said and done that can't be taken back.  Hurt has been impacted by insults.  No communication.  Just... horrific. 

Monday night the DJ, his brother and their friend were packing up the apartment.  Clearly I was upset because, after all of the stupid hurtfulness of the situation, I still love the DJ.  He's who I saw/see myself growing old with.  He's who I wanted around forever.  With other guys, they were people that would have been fine to be with forever.  But the DJ was WHO I wanted, specifically.  At 3:30 in the morning I was woken up by the DJ next to my bed.  We started talking and I started bawling.  We told each other things that we should have said a long time ago.  We explained ourselves.  We didn't make excuses.  We apologized.  We told each other we loved each other and missed each other.  We spent the last night together in our bed.  The next morning we said we would talk, and that the things that were already in motion (i.e. him moving out) would have to keep going that way.  We told each other we loved each other again, and I left for work.

We talked the next day for about 2 more hours.  We rehashed things.  I cried more.  We both said we don't know if we can forgive or get over the way things had been in the last month.  We both remember the good times and that we feel like we have something special, but is it worth the risk of this maybe happening again?  We don't know.  We decided to take this time apart to figure out what we want.  So the future is still really undecided, and the present is still really painful.

Work this week hasn't helped that...

PART 3: The Office (but less funny, if you can imagine that.)

So I'm still new at my office.  I'm still learning the ropes, and we are an international company so there's a lot to learn about outside of the office.  Unfortunately, my mentor, Craig, has been unavailable the last couple of weeks.  He was out for a week because his mother was ill.  He returned to work 2 weeks ago for a few days, but unfortunately his mother passed away mid-week, and he had to go back to Oklahoma.  So I was on my own AGAIN.  This time for a week and a half.  In the middle of planning travel for more than half of my office to AUSTRALIA for a big conference.  This is a list of how my week went.

1) Hi Evelyn, this is Connie.  I'm calling to book travel for....
2) Hi Evelyn, it's Connie again.  Just need to book one more person
3) You need a conference room for when?  Got it.
4) OK, no problem, I'll cancel that room.
5) Oh, you need that room again?  No problem... oops, wait, no more rooms available.
6) OK, time for a to-do list.  This is out of control.
7) HOLY MOTHER OF GOD THAT IS A LONG LIST
8) Who is coming from the other office?  THE HEAD OF OUR GLOBAL DEPARTMENT?!
9) Um.. hi there... I had no idea you were coming today.  No problem, Let me find you a computer, chair, desk, etc. because we HAVE NOTHING LEFT DUE TO 40 EXTRA PEOPLE BEING IN THE OFFICE TODAY!
10) Print
11) Print
12) Print
13) Hi Evelyn, it's Connie.  I need to completely cancel that trip and reschedule it from a different city and a different time and a different airline.
14) Hi, Car service?  Great.  I need to book 12 cars.  Oh, shoot you an email? Okey dokey.
15) What do you mean my request wasn't clear, car service? 
16) Hi Evelyn, I need to book 4 more people's travel and change 1.
17) Hi, Car Service,  It's Connie again.
18) I have booked that meeting room for you.  Oops, no?  Don't need it now. OOOOOOKey dokey.
19) No, I don't know when that invoice will be paid
20) Binding.
21) Continue trying to set up new employees from an office that is not mine, where everything has to go through Sydney anyway, where there are much more experienced people working.
22) FedEx Blackberries to new mystery people
23)Expenses
24) FOR THE LOVE, THE INVOICE IS NOT GETTING PAID.  TELL THEM TO WAIT!
25) The printer is out of ink?  Oh, ALL the printers are out of ink!  Greeeeaaaatttt!!
26) Paper jam.
27) Paper Jam.
28) PAPER JAM.
29) PAPER JAM WITH LOTS OF SLAMMING OF EXPENSIVE EQUIPMENT
30) Hi Evelyn?  I need to book travel for 2 people that aren't even from my company, let alone people that I actually support.  And I'm booking it for someone in my company who wants these people to attend, but clearly THAT guy's assistant is too busy... I dunno... sitting on her thumb, to do it herself!
31) Set up meeting
32) What do you mean the car is on location??  I'm looking and there is NO CAR HERE!
33) NO THAT'S NOT THE LOCATION!  I'M LOOKING AT THE EMAIL I SENT YOU RIGHT NOW!
34) Oh just FORGET the car!  He got a cab
35) Hi, Connie?  I'm boarding a plane to Sydney in 30 minutes from JFK and I forgot my wallet on my desk.  Can you get that to me by tomorrow Sydney time? 
36) HA!  FedEx is AWESOME!
37) What do you MEAN you can't make calls from your Blackberry in Australia?!
38) Email the ENTIRE TECH SERVICE TEAM GLOBALLY in a panic that causes several sweet but concerned emails to be returned instructing me that I emailed "quite a large group of people" and in the future I should just "email your IT Service Desk there in New York..." complete with smiley faces at the end of their sentences. But you know what?  DUDE CAN MAKE CALLS FROM AUSTRALIA NOW!

I was losing my shit by the end of last week.  But Craig is back now, and all is right with the world again.  I mean, look?  I have time to write this monstrosity!

PART 4: Last Weekend

Last weekend was a bit more calm that the previous 3.  I was home.  Friend Gia was in town.  Thursday night I met up with her and her friend Margaret for dinner at Les Halles.  Margaret trains hotel staff on hotel software and basically gets to stay in super swank hotels and get free stuff and it's fabulous.  Friday night, Gia and I went out for my first taste of Indian food, and people?  I'm in love!   I had Chicken Tikka Masala (I think...) with a crispy chicken salad and a crab and shrimp cake for an appetizer.  For dessert was this Delicious mango mousse which didn't sound great but it was wonderful!  MMmmmmmm...

Saturday I got my cable all hooked up.  Even in the bedroom on the TV that the DJ REFUSED to hook up because it wasn't HD and some such nonsense.  Whatever.  I have cable in my bedroom now, bitches.

Also, Gia and I took a trip to Century 21, a huge discount store much like Homegoods, except on crack.  I got curtains, clocks, artwork, a can opener, a sponge holder, fantastic!  So far, the living room and the bedroom are pretty well completed.  Now it's just adding and embellishing.  But they are totally scrubbed clean and rearranged.  The place looks huge and clean and put together.  It's fantastic.  My bedroom is now French Fashion themed and girlie.  The kitchen and bathroom are the next projects.  I'm hoping to have it all done and be able to return to the gym this week.  I hate feeling unsettled and that's basically what I've been feeling for the last month.  Now the apartment feels like mine, and it's very grown up.

I watched the Grammys last night and just LOVED it!  The performances were great, aside from the apparent audio issues.  Rhianna probably should have chosen a different backdrop for her performance with Drake, as fire was SO 5 minutes ago.  I really almost cried when Eminem won for Best Rap Album of the Year.  I don't know, I like him!  In all of his anger and fury and I was just so happy for him.  Also? Excessive wine may have been involved.  Also discovered that it was Mumford & Sons that I love and didn't realize it.  JLo and Marc Anthony pretty much secured with everyone that their marriage is weird and not funny.  Nicki Minaj looked like Cruela Devil gone wrong.  And Usher REALLY needed to shave.  I LOVE AWARDS SEASON!

One day, I would like to plan one of these events.  I think it would just be so fantastic!  Plus I could totally cry to Eminem about how great I think he is and really freak him out which would be awesome.

So there it is people.  My week in something much larger than a nutshell. I'll leave you with this picture... It's of Puka who has been just incredibly cuddly lately.  I can't decide if she feels lonely and misses the other 2 members of our past household, or if she can tell I'm a big bag of emotions and need her love.  But she has opted to stay THISCLOSE to me at all times...


It's OK, Mom... I'll love you :)


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